The scene unfolds in a hospital bed, where Captain Race Banner gradually regains consciousness. The doctor informs him, "You were struck by a bowling ball traveling at a velocity of 40 miles per hour." Yet, this revelation is not the forefront of Race's worries. Reassured that all the orphans in the bowling alley were rescued, our focus shifts momentarily—apologies for the detour, I was mistakenly sketching an episode from "Hotshots," not the much-anticipated midseason finale of "9-1-1," an episode heavily centered around Brad Torrance, culminating in the filming of his very own show. Let's not jump the gun.
"Wannabes" kicks off with an alternate "Hotshots" scene, where Brad's Captain Banner comes to the rescue of a woman trapped in a blazing vehicle. She urges him, "You don't need to burn too." He calmly assures her, "Hotshots don't catch fire; we merely get a bit crispy." Frankly, that's the kind of entertainment I crave, not the lackluster midpoint of "9-1-1" that we're presented with. Perhaps it's my lingering disdain for Brad's character from last week, but I feel the show could have concluded on a more uplifting note before its four-month hiatus.
Brad screens the latest "Hotshots" episode for his captive audience at the firehouse, less than thrilled by their indifferent reactions—especially after prompting them to dissect the inaccuracies. Bobby reminds him that the show isn't intended to be a documentary (preemptively dismissing my grievances about the unrealistic aspects of this "9-1-1" episode), while Buck argues that "real life is boring." I'd hesitate to agree when your real life resembles a weekly soap opera with life-or-death stakes, but I see his point. Brad isn't content; he aspires to be a real firefighter, not just an actor on a fictional show.
The initial call of the episode doesn't summon firefighters, instead revealing a riot at Fields Market, unwittingly sparked by—none other than—a YouTuber. Graham, alias the Cart Cop, spends his free time filming individuals who fail to return their shopping carts to the designated area. He attempts to leave a humiliating magnetic bumper sticker ("I GOT CART NARCED") on a woman's car, sparking a swiftly escalating chain of events: a minor car accident, a gridlocked parking lot, and plenty of shouting. Athena arrives on the scene, manages to calm the fray, and finally persuades the woman to return her cart. However, she warns Graham, calling him a nosy parker, "Stop this Cart Cop folly before you stir up the wrong kind of trouble." A hint of future conflict lurking in the shadows!
The subsequent emergency unfolded in a manner far more revolting, as a sewage pipeline erupted, triggering multiple vehicular collisions amidst a torrential downpour that drenched everyone below with a deluge of 5,000 gallons of foul wastewater. Upon the arrival of the 118, Brad's excitement knew no bounds ("There she blows!"), but his teammates, steeling themselves against the overpowering stench, dived into action. Eddie's mission was to save a young couple stranded in a submerged SUV, and I couldn't suppress a gag as they shared a kiss, immersed as they were in wastewater akin to liquid filth. "I know it smells nutty in there" barely scratches the surface of the stench. Brad, assigned to stand by and document the incident, couldn't resist the urge to rescue a woman, cradling her in his arms like a superhero, despite Bobby's appropriate horror – Brad hadn't checked her vitals or for head injuries. I couldn't fathom why Brad was even allowed on these calls; he was an actor with absolutely no training!
Back at the firehouse, it was time for a thorough shower and decontamination. Buck aptly described the smell as "a breeding ground of sour milk and ancient fish guts." Brad was riding high on his rescue triumph and the applause from bystanders who recognized him, but Bobby was poised to bring him back down to earth. The captain gave Brad a harsh reality check, lambasting him for his reckless and perilous behavior. "You're not a real firefighter, and no matter how many notes you scribble in that journal, it won't change that fact," Bobby snapped. As Bart Simpson famously put it, you could pinpoint the precise moment Brad's heart shattered into a million pieces.
A defeated Brad channeled his emotions into meticulously polishing the fire truck, as per Bobby's instructions. Eddie approached him for an autograph for Christopher (terrible timing, mate), quickly sensing Brad's distress. Brad confessed he was 47 with nothing tangible in his life – except, presumably, his seemingly successful TV show. I fully comprehend that people can be wealthy and famous yet profoundly unhappy (stream "Lucky" by Britney Spears for a vivid illustration). However, I resent the sudden portrayal of Brad as a protagonist. Eddie and Brad shared an intimate conversation, with Eddie revealing his estrangement from Christopher, stemming from his decision to pursue a CW pilot (a dark revelation indeed). Brad urged Eddie not to let the distance from Christopher widen any further.
The episode's next 9-1-1 call drew us back to Fields Market: "I think Cart Cop's dead!" He wasn't, but he was severely beaten and hovering on the brink of death when discovered. Chimney and Hen managed to revive his heart, while Athena embarked on an investigation. The only clue was a boot print on Graham's head and a myriad of motives. At the hospital, Graham couldn't recall the attack – understandable after being stomped on the head – but he did provide Athena and Detective Romero with a link to his YouTube channel. Graham, alias Cart Cop, had myriad enemies, all of whom were summoned for interviews by Athena and Romero. Each had a different reason to hate Graham and different boot sizes, but before Athena could crack the case like a detective in a fairy tale, the entire situation morphed into a debate about the necessity of returning shopping carts. (Of course, you do; were you raised by wolves?)
Elsewhere, the 118 team confronts a perilous situation with a potential jumper perched precariously on a freeway overpass. Buck and Eddie deploy their utmost efforts to persuade Craig to reconsider his grim decision, yet his attention remains oddly fixed on Brad – an observation that sparks a clever idea in Bobby's mind. He teases the actor with, "Fancy yourself a hero? Here's your moment to shine." Brad, sensing the significance of the occasion, finally steels himself to step into the spotlight and become the day's savior. Craig, utterly mesmerized, reveals that following his wife's departure, he binged on three seasons of 'Hotshots,' referring to Brad as his "comfort captain." For viewers who have leaned on '9-1-1' during breakups, layoffs, and even global pandemics, this heartfelt interaction resonates deeply.
However, Brad is enveloped in self-doubt, unable to fully grasp the impact 'Hotshots' holds for its fans. He shares with Craig that his character remains in a coma, a plot twist that leaves him disheartened. Craig, desperate to cling to hope, pleads, "You can't write off Captain Banner! He's the glue that binds the 119 fire family together!" This plea strikes a chord in Brad, reminding him of his own fear when Bobby's fate hung in the balance at the season's close. Realizing what he must do to dissuade Craig from taking the drastic leap, Brad promises that if Craig comes down, Race Banner will awaken from his slumber. This pact marks a dual victory: Craig is saved, and Brad is set to reprise his role in 'Hotshots,' bidding farewell to the 118. Though Callum Blue is admirably talented, it's undeniably time for this transition.
Meanwhile, the Cart Cop assault case is resolved with the revelation that the kindly older man, Ira, who returned the carts, was in fact a two-time convicted felon with a violent past. His alias uncovered, and his motive for assaulting Graham – who was stealing his job – laid bare, Athena encourages Graham to pursue a professional path in law enforcement. His hopeful inquiry about being ready for the police force is met with Angela Bassett's loving but honest response, "Baby, with all the love in my heart… no." Instead, she suggests he take up Ira's former role, a conclusion that brings a satisfactory close to the saga.
For the 118, the waters remain somewhat turbulent, particularly when Buck discovers Eddie scouting houses in El Paso to reunite with Christopher. Though tempting to dwell on this potential loss, '9-1-1's' history suggests Ryan Guzman's departure might be imminent. As Craig once said, Eddie Diaz is indispensable; he's the heartbeat of the 118 fire family. Speaking of 'Hotshots,' the episode "Wannabes" concludes with the filming of Race Banner's coma revival, a scene in which Chimney, Buck, and Eddie have secured roles. Ignore the logistical intricacies of these overworked individuals suddenly transforming into actors. Even with Hen offering medical accuracy tips, 'Hotshots' thrives on a foundation of disbelief, much like '9-1-1' itself.
