Let us bestow a thunderous standing ovation upon the genius minds responsible for "Abbott Elementary," for their fortunate scheduling of the series' inaugural Valentine's Day-themed episode as the 14th chapter of its second season. This delightful coincidence, coupled with the heartfelt gestures extended by Zach, Barbara, and Gary towards their respective lovers, constitutes the episode's most enchanting segment. The remainder, however, is ironically laden with regrettable timing and crossed wires — two elements capable of extinguishing the spark of romance from any scenario. Rather than witnessing the tension between Janine and Gregory slowly simmer into a passionate inferno, Jacob inadvertently spills the beans regarding Gregory's feelings, propelling Janine into an anxiety-ridden tailspin that culminates in a Valentine's Day far from fulfilling.
Since "Abbott" last adorned our screens (I must confess, I detest these brief two-week intervals they've adopted), Jacob unwittingly provoked Gregory into acknowledging a budding infatuation with Janine. Jacob somehow managed to keep this confidential — until his curiosity backfired spectacularly when he inserted himself into a conversation without comprehending its full context. One of Janine's students had cast her as the object of his affection, declaring his readiness for a "real woman" and slipping a Valentine into her mailbox. Donnie, the said student, persisted in his pursuit throughout the day, prompting Janine to confide in Melissa about navigating this innocent crush. Jacob interrupted mid-conversation, mistakingly assuming Janine was discussing Gregory, given their similar behaviors towards her. Both Donnie and Gregory bestowed her with candy, garnered her attention by knocking on her door, and Donnie even tidied the classroom, actions eerily reminiscent of Gregory's demeanor. By the time they realized their misunderstanding, it was too late to retract the revelation, leaving Janine to grapple with this unforeseen information.
Amidst their propensity for overthinking, the timing of this emotional revelation couldn't have been more inopportune. Janine was officially dating Maurice, while Gregory was involved with Amber, the mother of his former student. I commend the show for clarifying that Gregory is no longer Amber's child's teacher, as such a relationship would be both inappropriate and unprofessional in his new role as a full-time Abbott employee. These are treacherous waters for a sitcom in 2023... In 1993, or even 2013, the writers might have eagerly pursued such a storyline, but I digress.
Unbeknownst to Janine, who was now privy to his conversation with Jacob, Gregory confided in her about his Valentine's Day gift for Amber, sparking yet another instance of misunderstanding. He pulled her aside, a gift bag clutched in his hand, initiating the conversation by asserting the importance of his query. She, mistaking his intent, assumed it pertained to her and embarked on a rambling discourse about the complexities of "it," only to discover that Gregory sought her advice on a Lego flower bouquet intended for Amber, who is allergic to real flowers. Though Janine admired the thoughtful gesture and bestowed her blessing, a palpable disappointment lingered in her heart.
Even though all her coworkers were in unison, affirming that Gregory's attraction to her was as plain as day, Janine clung to the delusion that all was well—Gregory harbored feelings for Amber, and her own affections lay with Maurice. However, when Maurice arrived after school to present Janine with her gift, it became abundantly clear that these couples were as mismatched as night and day. He handed her an eye-catching large platinum-silver Telfar bag that immediately drew the attention of Amber (and myself), who ostensibly came to the school to pick up her child but left with Gregory, sans offspring. Oblivious to the cult-like status of Telfar in the fashion world, Janine mistakenly assumed the purse was merely a disguise for her actual present, hidden within a gift bag. Meanwhile, Amber unwrapped a Lego set from Gregory and inquired if it was meant for her children. The need for a partner switch was excruciatingly evident; Amber deserved the Telfar, and Janine the Lego set. The couples went their separate ways to celebrate Valentine's Day, with Gregory casting one final longing glance over his shoulder. Sigh. These two were destined to be together, but today was not their day—let the slow-burning romance continue to simmer.
Though February is synonymous with Cupid's festival, brands insist on reminding us that it's also Black History Month. Or, rather, a four-week charade of feigned concern for Black individuals, punctuated by tone-deaf advertisements showcasing their "support," only to be promptly forgotten come March 1. I can't resist being cynical about America's peculiar brand of performative diversity [insert image of Nancy Pelosi and fellow Democrats kneeling in kente cloth to "honor" George Floyd], having witnessed countless times how white America believes visibility and opportunity are the silver bullets to systemic racism, without making any genuine efforts to improve the living conditions of Black people. Jacob, Abbott's anti-racist Icarus, is all too familiar with this reality and educates his students on Black history year-round. However, one parent raised a hue and cry over a white teacher imparting Black history to their son, dutifully complaining to Ava, prompting the principal to observe Jacob's class.
After eavesdropping on Jacob's enlightening discourse on Martin Luther King Jr.'s true sentiments towards capitalism and how, by the twilight of his life, his ideologies aligned more closely with Malcolm X's than white historians care to admit, Ava, a self-professed autodidact, became engrossed and eager to delve deeper into the subject. She subsequently resolved to attend night school to further her education. While Jacob and his partner Zach attributed Ava's sudden interest in learning to her personal growth, I contend that Jacob's teaching methodology ignited a spark within her. As someone who was schooled in Black history from a Black perspective since childhood and has since become a teacher of Black culture myself, I firmly believe that if certain knowledge were imparted more comprehensively and truthfully, more young Black students would embrace education with enthusiasm. Ava's peers, and even current students, are not fortunate enough to have teachers like Jacob. Yes, he'll forever be Mr. C for corny, but he possesses a natural talent for captivating students and fostering meaningful conversations throughout the year, not merely in February. I applauded Ava for calling out that parent in support of Jacob. Our educational system has failed countless individuals, regardless of race, by presenting learning as a cookie-cutter, militaristic endeavor and feeding us racist, revisionist history.
All in all, Valentine's Day at Abbott lacked the sweetness and sentimentality typical of the occasion, yet it retained its heartwarming charm. And finally, Gregory and Janine's romance seemed inevitable. In the meantime, I eagerly await seeing how Janine styles that bag.
