In 2015, The Chicago Tribune revealed that the fundraising industry racks up an impressive $3.3 billion in annual sales, with an astonishing 94 percent of schools relying on these efforts to augment district funds. To this very day, the mere mention of fundraising evokes in me a childhood shame, vividly recalling the embarrassment of confessing to my mother that I had consumed the very candy entrusted to me for selling. However, as Barbara aptly phrases it, such fundraisers are a necessary evil for numerous students attending underfunded schools.
Beyond merely bolstering their school's finances, fundraising activities serve as a crucible for honing students' social skills as they venture into the community to meet their targets. Though it felt more akin to an involuntary participation in an extended marshmallow test, this endeavor compelled me to master the art of confident and charismatic public speaking. Barbara, coaching the students with unwavering determination, encouraged them to hold their heads high and make firm yet respectful eye contact as they solicited donations for a field trip to the Franklin Institute science museum. Despite her best efforts, her instructions alone barely budged the illustrated progress bar, inching forward ever so slightly, prompting Ava to intervene with her own tried-and-true sales techniques.
Reluctantly, Barbara joined forces with Ava, who instilled in the students a relentless hustle mentality. "Wanna sell some chocolate? Do whatever it takes," Ava exhorted. She advocated for deceptive practices such as fake sales to lure in new customers and withholding change under the pretense that customers "aren't Sam Cooke, so change ain't gonna come." She even suggested fabricating illnesses, arguing that "nobody likes to buy from happy people." Her target demographic of choice? Liberal white people. Appalled by Ava's teachings, which she deemed as transforming the students into mini scammers, Barbara reprimanded her. Yet, Ava stood firm in her conviction, arguing that results spoke louder than words. Eventually, they reached a compromise, agreeing to abandon the deceit and racial profiling in their fundraising endeavors.
After the students surpassed their goal ahead of schedule, Ava urged them onward, suggesting they broaden their market reach to amass even greater funds, hinting at the tantalizing prospect of hiring a flesh-and-blood librarian to replace the spectacle-wearing Alexa. With renewed vigor, they ventured to the mall, where their sales prowess was so formidable that Ava boasted they could "peddle a humid day to a silk-pressed soul."
Coincidentally, Delisha Sloss, the woman whom Barbara had coerced into funneling grant money to Abbott, was also present at the mall. It was an opportunity too good to pass up; they approached her with a sales pitch. When one of Barbara's students offered a candy bar for a dollar, Delisha revealed that Henry had already sold her the same item for two dollars, thereby exposing their less-than-honorable pricing strategies. Embarrassed and cornered, Barbara was compelled to refund Delisha and endure snide remarks from her so-called "fellow worker in Christ." Ava conceded that she had encouraged the students to overcharge, pocketing the excess as commission. Barbara condemned the entire operation and expressed her regret at collaborating with Ava.
The tension spilled over into the following day, with Barbara giving Ava the silent treatment. Ava, unaccustomed to such coldness in "her" school, insisted that Barbara voice her complaints. Throughout the series, Ava's upbringing and its influence on her parenting style have become apparent. Though she often cracks inappropriate jokes and prioritizes herself, she is also the person Henry feels comfortable approaching when his family's financial constraints become apparent, such as when he outgrew his pants. Without judgment or condescension, Ava provided him with a new pair from her Avalicious line, kept handy in her drawer. Her motivation in teaching Henry how to finesse is to empower him financially. She told Barbara that her hustle mentality had propelled her from similar circumstances as Henry to becoming the school's principal and suggested that Barbara's adherence to stringent morals was luxury she could afford because of her financial stability.
While Barbara may never fully endorse Ava's worldview, the principal's words resonated with her. She apologized to Walter for putting him in an awkward position with Delisha, marking the first instance an adult had apologized to him. She then invited him to assist with her church bake sale, offering him a 5% commission, an opportunity for him to put his sales skills to constructive use. Loyal to Ava, Henry negotiated for 90%, but they compromised at 10%. Ava continued her benevolent streak, pledging transparency with Barbara whenever she conceived of morally ambiguous ideas, before returning Barbara's school ID, which she had appropriated to score free pancakes as a teacher perk, since principals were ineligible.
Meanwhile, Mr. Johnson and Jacob, despite their recent alliance, found themselves at odds over their newfound co-parenting role for a stray cat discovered in a school closet. Their parenting styles clashed drastically; one was a helicopter parent, while the other was laid-back and fun-loving. Their disagreements over nap schedules, microchipping, and lactose intolerance escalated into full-blown conflicts, until Melissa intervened for some much-needed mediation. They agreed that the cat would reside full-time with Jacob in his stable, two-parent household but visit Mr. Johnson every other weekend at his "geriatric bachelor pad" (Jacob's words). However, this harmony was short-lived when fourth-grader Brianne began distributing flyers featuring Milton, who had been missing since she brought him in for show and tell. They returned him promptly, but Mr. Johnson mourned the loss of his dream of driving off into the sunset with his feline companion, never looking back.
The duo deserving a fairytale escape into the sunset are none other than Janine and Gregory, whose narrative has finally broken free from the monotony of a Disney Channel pre-winter break saga. Maurice and Janine's playful text exchanges have escalated into something more tangible when Maurice materializes at the school, charmingly bribing a student with chocolate to win Janine's favors and subsequently inviting her out. Gregory, wary of Maurice's intense nature, forewarns Janine, expressing his reluctance to bear any repercussions should their romance sour. Janine reassuringly dismisses his concerns with a clumsily awkward punchline, leaving the conversation in an even more cringe-worthy limbo.
Janine is smitten by Maurice, excitedly gossiping about their impending date in the teachers' lounge. To me, he's somewhat corny, indulging in sending her pictures of lookalike white celebrities and audio clips of his laughter instead of the conventional "lol." Yet, this quirky behavior perfectly aligns with Janine's tastes. Maurice's charm, albeit disingenuous, is evident from his earlier treatment of students before discovering Janine's authority, and it's clearly working its magic on her. Meanwhile, Gregory's jealousy over their courtship prompts an inexplicable and perplexing move—he attempts to purchase chocolate from Janine after overhearing her raves about Maurice. Jacob, noting Gregory's unusual behavior considering he neither buys candy from his students nor likes it, suspects something amiss. When Jacob bluntly asks Gregory if he harbors feelings for Janine, Gregory's flustered evasion speaks volumes.
By episode's end, Gregory reluctantly grants Janine his blessing for her date with Maurice, perhaps realizing that if he can't confess his true sentiments, he owes it to her to live her life freely. Nonetheless, he does offer her some parting advice, suggesting she refrain from ordering ribs, which he's witnessed her consume with "aggressive" fervor before. Ignoring his counsel, Janine gleefully devours her messy ribs as Maurice confides in her about his childhood traumas. Sauce smudged across her face, she declines Maurice's napkin offer and voraciously finishes her meal, proving that Gregory knows her inside out.
