Maria Shriver has bravely unveiled her journey through loss and sorrow in a profound manner. In her latest literary venture, "I Am Maria," a poignant compilation of verse and introspection, the 69-year-old author unveils a harrowing moment where she could scarcely rise from the hotel room floor upon discovering her husband, Arnold Schwarzenegger's, betrayal. This revelation came as a cruel double blow, following closely on the heels of the demise of both her parents.
"I was engulfed in a maelstrom of grief, torn by a tumult of confusion, rage, dread, sorrow, and apprehension. My identity, my belonging, felt shattered. Truthfully, it was a harrowing ordeal, and I was struck with terror," Shriver penned in an excerpt, featured by People on March 24, Monday.
"As I sat huddled on the cold hotel room floor, shrouded in darkness, tears cascading down my cheeks, a voice echoed within: Maria, this is not the end for you," she added, painting a vivid picture of her vulnerability.
Yet, Shriver discovered the strength to endure. The couple's 25-year marriage crumbled when Shriver learned of Schwarzenegger's indiscretions, leading to their divorce filing in 2011.
She refrains from burdening her readers with "the mundane tales of my self-pitying meltdown" or the numerous visits to "an array of therapists, healers, shamans, and psychics." Instead, she shares a poignant anecdote.
"I even ventured across the nation to a secluded convent," Shriver recounts. "At the conclusion of my stay, Mother Dolores gently took me aside, and in a scene reminiscent of 'The Sound of Music,' she said to me, 'Maria, I understand you find solace here. But if you harbor thoughts of joining us, let me clarify, it's not feasible. Our admission age limit is fifty, and you're fifty-five!'"
"She continued, 'What you truly seek, my dear, is the liberty to leave your marriage and embrace your true self as Maria.' She enveloped me in a hug, and we both shed tears," Shriver elaborates.
"I've committed numerous errors. One was tying my self-esteem to my accomplishments," she confesses in the book. "Another colossal blunder was believing that an external force could assure my security, worth, and tranquility."
Shriver and Schwarzenegger, 77, finalized their divorce in December 2021.
Concluding the excerpt, Shriver writes, "I've confronted other misguided beliefs—pertaining to aging and solitude. Once, I believed that lacking a partner signified unworthiness and unloveability. I've come to understand that this could not be further from reality."
"I Am Maria" is poised for publication on April 1, 2025.
